your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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