i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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