Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
