what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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