I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
