So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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