I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm at about main and main street
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
