We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
