fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
