i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
im on a boat
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