Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
