Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
