her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
