You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Im part way to drunk.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize