he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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