yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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