I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize
