This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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