well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Damn victory sex feels great
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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