No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
