did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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