no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
