I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
