Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
