UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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