dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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