So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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