I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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