bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
All the doctor said was why
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
