btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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