so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Randomize
