so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He passed out mid-signature
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
