Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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