How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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