I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
