Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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