Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
