I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize