I looked at my own cervix.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
