Can i not drive my cunt home
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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