Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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