rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
And the cops told us we were all naked.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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