He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
