i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
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