I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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