If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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