she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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