Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
did you just send me my own nude
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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