I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
