Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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