Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
whose parrot is this?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
