shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize